How can nature be so evil as to put such a beautiful thing called a rose in front of us, tease us with its beauty, and then require us to risk our well-being and comfort by way of the thorns in order to hold it in our hands. I can also say it this way. How can nature be so evil as to put such a beautiful thing called a dream in front of us, tease us with its beauty, and then require us to risk our well-being and comfort by way of the obstacles in order to hold it in our hands. Do you get it? A dream is like a rose as obstacles are like thorns. Let’s apply that metaphor to a real-life situation.
Jenny has a dream of becoming a major rock star. She has an excellent voice, and plays a mean guitar. Sam, Jenny’s friend arranges a gig for her at the local bar and grill. It’s what she’s been waiting for. She accepts, performs marvelously, and rocks the crowd like she never had before. That experience of success gave her enough steam to keep practicing and keep looking for places to perform. After a while, rejection starts to pile up like a ten car accident on the Los Angeles freeway. People have told her “no,” so much that she thinks that’s her new name. Her money is low, and she doesn’t want to practice anymore. She considers giving up. This is the result of hard-core disappointment settling in. Soon, she’s wondering if she is really cut out to do what she is doing. What worked for her yesterday isn’t working for her today. While she is low, the critics show up and give their unsporting opinions. She has now moved from disappointment to despair, and she stops doing anything. Have you been there? Are you there now? I sure have been. It doesn’t matter if the situation that takes you there is a relationship, a pro athletic career, attempting to lose weight, or entrepreneurial endeavors, you feel like a looser. Every time you exhale, the word despair floats out. That pain you feel is the thorn. Unchecked, the thorn will cause you to DECIDE to become inconsistent until you give up. Have you ever heard the expressions: “Every rose has its thorn,” or “If you enjoy the fragrance of a rose, you must accept the thorns which it bears.” I’ll say it this way for you animal lovers. “The fleas come with the dog,” or, “the poot comes with the cat.” All of those metaphors suggest you must take the bad with the good. If you have any desire for anything in your life, you’ll face that situation. So how do you deal with it? Here are four strategies.
1.) Silence the critic’s voices in your head. What critic’s say most of the time is dis-empowering to you, which only adds to your despair. Only listen to qualified people who want to help put you on track to success, and the most qualified person to listen to is you when you are in the right state of mind of course.
2.) Realize that life ebbs and flows like the tides of the ocean. There are up times, and down times. Accepting that will do a lot for your metal tolerance of what is happening to you.
3.) Change your perspective about what is happening to you. Abraham Lincoln once said, “We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses.” Humm. What a way to look at your situation. Focus on what you are becoming, or what you will be getting, not all the obstacles. This will empower you and that’s what you need to get around the thorns and get to the rose. You won’t act unless you feel empowered, so empower yourself by saying theses words when you feel disappointment and definitely before you reach despair. I can do it; I’ve got what it takes. Say it! I couldn’t hear you. That’s better.
4.) Do what you need to do anyway. Do it until… Do it when you are sick of it. This strategy goes along with strategy number three. Once you feel better about yourself, you’ll take action. Nothing changes except by action. You know, that cause, and effect thing.
None of us has any idea about what we can become, or what we can accomplish, if we could just hang in there, keep growing, and keep learning. Think about how great your life can be when you have accomplished your dream. Saying “no” to your dream is also saying no to all the positive possibilities than can come out of the pursuit of it. Be strong and get your rose.