How to Handle Life’s Negatives


 Jonathan Desaussure


“Life isn’t about how hard you can hit; it’s about how much you can get hit and keep moving forward.” – Rocky Balboa

(Movie, Balboa 2006)


Everyone has negative situations occur in their lives. Negative happens to all of us. There’s no escaping it. There are two things you need to do when you are facing adversity.

Before I tell you what they are, I want to prove it to you with your help. You’ll get it by taking note of the person and his behavior I’ll talk about in my anecdote.

My person example person, let’s call him Aurey. It’s 7:45 A.M. and Aurey cruises in his car in fast moving traffic. He’s tapping on the steering wheel, and rocking out to the morning tunes on the radio.  Aurey looks down and to his right at an attractive business folder lying on the passenger seat of his car. He smiles. He looks at the clock on the dashboard, and then, back at the road ahead.

“I’ll tear up the interview. This job is mine,” he says. Before he has a chance to let his words settle in on his subconscious, distant car brake lights come on, causing a wave of brake lights to come on. The illuminated brake lights move toward him, like a rushing tidal wave. Traffic slows down to a crawl rate of twenty feet per minute. He looks at the clock. It’s 7:50 A.M.

“Damn,” he says, and slams his hand on the steering wheel.

He looks out the passenger window. There’s an opening. He turns the wheel quickly and mashes the gas. Out of nothingness, a car appears and skids to a stop in the exact spot he wants to go. I’m not going to make it, he thinks. He looks at the clock: 7:59 A.M. I guess I wasn’t supposed to get that damn job. I don’t know why I applied for it anyway? The universe is against me. God doesn’t want me to have it.

Aurey glances out the window.

I don’t see an accident anywhere. What gives? It must be a dead cat or something holding up traffic. Where the hell is a cop when you need one; they sure need to do something with these traffic lights around here anyway. It’s never going to happen now.

Aurey arrives at work late. He rushes in and rudely apologizes to the interviewer, which he didn’t make a good impression. Here’s a hint; there’s no follow-up interview or even any smiles exchanged.

Aurey arrives at his cubicle. His coworker leans over the top of the divider, smiling.

“Hay! What happened to you? Are you okay?”

“Damn traffic,” Aurey says, and then he rudely turns away from his coworker and sulks as he works.

Does this situation or attitude resonate with you? We’ve all been there when we didn’t know any better, and on occasions even when we did know better. We may even have met somebody that behaved that way toward us today. What’s going on with Aurey? An expectation wasn’t met, thus frustration set in. When outside situations don’t line up with inside expectations, humans have a tendency to become frustrated, negative, and cynical. Then we start with the stinkin thinking, which negatively affect our emotional state, which renders us ineffective in both action and emotion.

The solution lies in what we focus on. When we focus on the PROBLEM, we MAGNIFY the problem and or the situations that allow the problem to remain. Before I go on, let’s talk about a couple of laws that are at play here.

  1.  Law of attraction. Like energy attracts like things. Sour puss attracts sour puss. Stink eye attracts stink eye. That’s stank eye if you’re street. And, bad thoughts attract negative feelings. What we want to do is focus our energy and our attention on the solution to our problem.
  2. Law of Randomness. The universe has a random order to it. There are things that happen that we had nothing to do with, but we’ll have to deal with it. Don’t take on things you aren’t responsible for.
  3. Law of Responsibility. We are responsible for where we end up in life, because there are two things we CAN control, and that’s how we deal.


Here’s a nugget that’s hard to swallow. We create much of our experience, or we allowed it manifest through our ignorance. Ouch! I know, right. That’s good news though, because knowing that we can control or influence our experience empowers us. Now that you know all of this, here are the two things you do to handle the negative. Ready?

  1. Control what you think.
  2. Control what you do.


It’s simple, but not so simple, huh? Those are the two things we can control; unless there are extenuating circumstances, and I realize there are are extreme cases. I pray for those of you who do have those overbearing situations where whoever or whatever doesn’t want you to prosper. May you find a way to a better place. Some problems won’t go away over night, just like some seeds grow faster than others. That’s another sermon though. In order for me to drive the point home, let’s look at Aurey’s actions and thoughts.


Problem thought: It’s not going to happen.
Solution thought: I’ll get another interview. One is waiting for me.
Problem thought: I wasn’t supposed to get the job.  Solution thought: I missed this one, and it’s no fault of my own. Now I have more time to become even better for next time.

Problem thought: God, or the universe, doesn’t want me to have it. This one is deep rooted in self-image, religious philosophy, and more. Too mush to deal with here. It’s another sermon for another day.

Solution thought: God does want me to have it. I deserve it and receive it. I’ll have faith and take massive action.

We are often frustrated because we don’t understand the process of manifesting success and we lack the patience.  That slows our activity and weakens our mental focus, which only prolongs the harvest, which will only come if we believe it can come in the first place. It’s the same negative action as planting a seed, fertilizing the seed, watering the seed, then digging it up to see what’s happening. You know what happens. If we do that, we’ll kill the process. We have to leave it in the ground, diligently care for it, and trust the process. It’s a discipline of diligently keeping our minds aligned with what we want to manifest, and physically pressing on consistently. Sometimes it hurts to press on, like in the case of vigorous exercise, but it’s necessary. It’s the process. It’s the only way to get what you want.

We are always in the process of overcoming and becoming something bigger, expanding so to speak, hopefully for good things. I leave you with this. Hold to your vision with unwavering faith, work, and trust the process.

Don’t forget to follow and share.
Thank you for reading. I hope it blessed you.


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